"Moe" is to Fruit Flies as "Voldemort" is to the Wizarding Community

You can call me He Who Must Not Be Named if you want, fruit flies. Doesn't change who I am.

We had a really bad fruit fly problem in our kitchen. They were everywhere, even when we eliminated all fruit from the kitchen. I went online for a possible remedy. I found two and tried one:

Fill a small bowl with water.
Drop in a bit of detergent.
Place a bit of fruit in (I used a pear slice) so that it's partially sticking out of the water.
Cover the whole thing with tight plastic wrap.
Poke a few holes in the plastic wrap.

The flies are attracted by the smell of the fruit. They linger on the bowl and eventually find the holes and climb in. Once inside, they can't find the holes to get out and eventually fall into the detergenty water.

I did this last night. By this morning there were dozens of the bastards dead in there, plus one resilient baby fruit fly who survived but has a lightning scar on his head. Weird.

The other plan, which I haven't tried yet:
Put all your skanky fruit in the oven, like a pile of it, leave the door open, but obviously don't turn it on.
Go to bed.
Get up.
Slam oven door closed.
Bake, baby, bake.

That might be tonight.