Friday, February 27, 2009

Superuseless Superpowers

This is the funniest thing I've ever seen. Superuseless Superpowers. Like "Healing Punch":


Float like a butterfly and sting like the bedside manner of Mother Teresa. As a superhero, sometimes you have to resort to violence. Too bad your ferocious fists instantly heal the damage you inflict. Whereas most punches would deliver a crushing Ivan Drago-like knockout. Yours leave your opponent feeling amazingly refreshed and rejuvenated. At least until he counters with an uppercut to your esophagus.



Then there's:

SUPERUSELESS SUPERPOWER: NO-GOliath
Superhuman size. Totally human feet. Upon engaging the No-Go-liath power, the upper 95% of our superhero swells to impressive size. Shortly thereafter, he topples like Nick Nolte at an open-bar charity ball. Does anyone have a XXXXXL Hoveround?




Oh just go.

**

2 comments:

Seth Hanisek said...

Check our Mur Lafferty's Playing For Keeps - novel based on the same concept.

Tina Rowley said...

Thoroughly delightful. And now I bring your attention to:

Tiny Art Director

Make haste.