I've Enjoyed The Gig.

I've been reviewing books for Amazon.com for a few years now. It's given me a great chance to review some excellent books and also The Fabulist. But there's another free-lancer with lots of time on his hands who's coming on strong. How long before he leaves the customer review section and bumps me off the editorial review racket?

Finally...

A ticket that everyone can get behind.

James Taylor Will Soon Not Be Your Friend

Better start getting used to it. (I have a new piece on McSweeney's today).

Conversation At Breakfast With Charlie (Age 3)

HIM: Dad! DAAAAD!
ME: What? What is it?
HIM: Who made the world?
ME: Oh. Wow. Uhhh...Well, some people say that God made the world. Some people think it was a big explosion a long time ago.
HIM: Was it the same person who painted our house?
ME: No I don't think so.
HIM: Was it the same person who made this plate?
ME: Well, maybe, yeah.

Best Thing Ever?

Could be. (some bizarrely lewd language).

Being Famous Is Fun!

So I hosted some radio show today. Two qualitative analyses of my performance came in. I'll summarize:
First listener: Good show
Second listener: Horrible voice, lousy voice, high voice, monotone voice, not funny, self absorbed, bad diction, dopey, not cute, moronic, sounds like he has phlegm in his mouth, just OFF, please don't let him on the air ever again.

So really, feedback was mixed.

This Isn't Funny At All

Nope. Not at all. Don't visit this not funny site right away.