Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Joke sought

Trying some social networking for professional goals here (and Facebook and Twitter). I was thinking it would be good to have a joke at the end of this week's show. If it really catches on maybe it's something we do every week so people have a reason to stay tuned all through the credits. A little bon bon like This American Life does with Torey Malatia at the end. So I'm looking for a joke: something quick, tight, maybe newsy or maybe not, clean. Heard any good jokes lately?

_

26 comments:

Scott Chicken said...

You can never go wrong with "guess what? Chicken Butt!" but that kind of requires two hosts...Maybe you can pick up the rights to the old Mariner's ad with Jay Buhner doing standup and just run him saying "Horse walks in to a bar...Bartender says 'why the long face?' "

Bill said...

Resubmitting my Twitter post...

Parenting is my most rewarding occupation. Sadly though, my grocer will not accept titters, guffaws, & hugs as payment for eggs. But it's OK. The Federal Government is hard at work on a plan to allow my kids' kids to bail me out. So, in the end, parenting is truly the best reward.

Shane said...

Heard this today:

How many hipsters does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

"I don't know, how many?"

(said as snarkily as possible, with an appropriate head-tilt, eyebrow askew)
"You don't know?"

Doesn't work as well in text, hopefully you get the idea. It made me lol.

Gina said...

What do you call a fish with no eyes?

A Fsh.

(Again, needs to be said. eyes/i's)

quakerflygirl said...

Q. What do you get when you cross a brown chicken and a brown cow?

[Punchline must be delivered to the tune of "Bomchicka Wow Wow" a/k/a the joke "sex stuff is happenin'" music in porn movies.]

A. Brown chicken brown cow.

Scott Chicken said...

For the record, in an informal Chicken extended-family poll, the "Brown chicken brown cow..." joke doesn't play to the over 45 set, which is odd since that music is so classically 70s porn. As one cousin said, "You probably like Ira Glass too, don't you..."

Christopher said...

Q: "What's the difference between a 'hockey mom' and a pit bull"

A: "A pit bull knows more about foreign policy."

Paige said...

Q.Why did the Teacher turn on the lights?
A.The class was a bit dim!

Wanna find jokes as lame as this one? www.ajokeaday.com

deb said...

Bha ha ha! "...A pit bull knows more about foreign policy." I love it!

Variations on a theme:

Var1: Two guys walk into a bar... which is funny because you'd think one of them would have seen it.

Var2: A guy walks into a bar. "Ouch!" he says.

Elisabeth Fredrickson said...

Q: How many conservative economists does it take to change a light bulb?

A1: None. If the government would just leave it alone, it would screw itself in.

A2: None, because, look! It's getting brighter! It's definitely getting brighter!

A3: None, they're all waiting for the unseen hand of the market to correct the lighting disequilibrium.

(Timely, I think. From The Wharton Journal via some guy at Notre Dame http://www.nd.edu/~jstiver/jokes.htm)

Bill said...

Bailout often require a bucket,
Paulson claims we can not duck it.
Both Senate & Congress did try,
But neither did fly.
It seems we've been all told to... um how do I say this...

Bill said...

OR...
Bailout often require a bucket,
Paulson claims we can not duck it.
Both Senate & Congress did try,
The Senate's did fly.
That next tax rebate? Chuck it.

scouter573 said...

If all the economists in the world lay down on the Equator, head to foot, they still wouldn't reach a conclusion.

scouter573 said...

If you think it's butter, but it's not, you're eating in the wrong place.

(Repeat aloud and slur your words)

scouter573 said...

Here are a couple that I stole (reference at the end):

What is the difference between a 12" pizza and an investment banker? A 12" pizza can feed a family of 4.

Or, the definition of an optimist? An investment banker ironing 5 shirts on Sunday night.

Source: London Daily Photo blog, http://londondailyphoto.blogspot.com/2008/11/crisis-i-see-no-crisis.html

Anonymous said...

порно фото с подростками http://free-3x.com/ фото 18 летних free-3x.com/ малолетняя девочка мастурбирует [url=http://free-3x.com/]free-3x.com[/url]

Anonymous said...

Hi !.
You re, I guess , probably curious to know how one can collect a huge starting capital .
There is no initial capital needed You may begin to get income with as small sum of money as 20-100 dollars.

AimTrust is what you thought of all the time
The firm represents an offshore structure with advanced asset management technologies in production and delivery of pipes for oil and gas.

Its head office is in Panama with offices everywhere: In USA, Canada, Cyprus.
Do you want to become really rich in short time?
That`s your chance That`s what you desire!

I`m happy and lucky, I began to get real money with the help of this company,
and I invite you to do the same. It`s all about how to choose a proper companion utilizes your funds in a right way - that`s the AimTrust!.
I take now up to 2G every day, and what I started with was a funny sum of 500 bucks!
It`s easy to join , just click this link http://haliwosuc.freecities.com/ogawiv.html
and lucky you`re! Let`s take this option together to become rich

Anonymous said...

Hi !.
You may , probably very interested to know how one can manage to receive high yields .
There is no need to invest much at first. You may commense to get income with as small sum of money as 20-100 dollars.

AimTrust is what you thought of all the time
The firm incorporates an offshore structure with advanced asset management technologies in production and delivery of pipes for oil and gas.

It is based in Panama with structures everywhere: In USA, Canada, Cyprus.
Do you want to become a happy investor?
That`s your chance That`s what you really need!

I feel good, I began to get real money with the help of this company,
and I invite you to do the same. If it gets down to select a correct partner who uses your money in a right way - that`s it!.
I earn US$2,000 per day, and my first deposit was 1 grand only!
It`s easy to start , just click this link http://ymowopabu.1accesshost.com/uziruf.html
and go! Let`s take our chance together to get rid of nastiness of the life

Anonymous said...

Good day !.
might , perhaps curious to know how one can make real money .
There is no need to invest much at first. You may commense earning with as small sum of money as 20-100 dollars.

AimTrust is what you thought of all the time
The firm incorporates an offshore structure with advanced asset management technologies in production and delivery of pipes for oil and gas.

It is based in Panama with offices everywhere: In USA, Canada, Cyprus.
Do you want to become really rich in short time?
That`s your choice That`s what you really need!

I`m happy and lucky, I started to get income with the help of this company,
and I invite you to do the same. If it gets down to select a proper companion who uses your funds in a right way - that`s AimTrust!.
I make 2G daily, and my first deposit was 1 grand only!
It`s easy to start , just click this link http://emakodev.maddsites.com/rocozy.html
and go! Let`s take this option together to feel the smell of real money

Anonymous said...

ВИА [url=http://dejavu-group.ru/svadba.php]Dejavu-group[/url] - это коллектив виртуозных вокалистов и музыкантов.
[url=http://dejavu-group.ru/about_us.php]Dejavu-group[/url]- лидер в области музыкального оформления корпоративных вечеринок, свадеб, торжеств, шоу программ, музыкальных ыечеров.
В копилке музыкальной группы Дежа вю около 3 тыс. произведений.
Живая музыка. Диско, хиты 70-80-90-х, джаз, ретро, шансон, современная музыка, европейские хиты, фоновая музыка, поп .
ВИА Дежа вю обладает мощной качественной аппаратурой, позволяющей заполнить приятным уху звуком как маленькое помещение (фуршет), так и огромное пространство (корпоратив до 1 тыс. человек).

Игорь +7 916 623 4047

Anonymous said...

Thanks for the informative information - I enjoyed reading it! I always enjoy this blog. :) Cheers, [url=http://watch-a-women-give-birth.com]watch a women give birth[/url]

Anonymous said...

Hello everyone!
I would like to burn a theme at here. There is such a nicey, called HYIP, or High Yield Investment Program. It reminds of financial piramyde, but in rare cases one may happen to meet a company that really pays up to 2% daily not on invested money, but from real profits.

For several years , I make money with the help of these programs.
I don't have problems with money now, but there are heights that must be conquered . I make 2G daily, and my first investment was 500 dollars only.
Right now, I'm very close at catching at last a guaranteed variant to make a sharp rise . Turn to my blog to get additional info.

http://theblogmoney.com

Anonymous said...

Hi everybody!

Let me introduce myself,
friends call me Nikolas.
Generally I’m a venturesome analyst. for a long time I’m keen on online-casino and poker.
Not long time ago I started my own blog, where I describe my virtual adventures.
Probably, it will be interesting for you to find out about my progress.
Please visit my web page . http://allbestcasino.com I’ll be glad would you find time to leave your opinion.

Anonymous said...

[url=http://www.pi7.ru/seks-sekrety/1887-palma-pervenstva-v-sekse-prinadlezhit-ryzhim-bestiyam.html ]Свежие фото приколы [/url]
Делаю вывод, что у некоторых гардероб стоит огромные деньги, при всем при этом они жалуются на давку в метро, нечистые улицы, коие омрачают их суперобувь и т.п. У меня возникает вопрос: зачем при таком благосостоянии переться в метро в час пик? На работу ездить? Не вижу смысла, все мои удачные знакомые давно не сидят в офисах, работают удаленно. И вообще зачем жить в Москве? Не лучше ли за городом, на свежем воздхе, куда как полезней? Или это пишут те, что живут на окраине в съемной однушке, на всем экономят, но в бренде?

Anonymous said...

[url=http://www.pi7.ru/zhenskiy-zhurnal/1643-ty-krasiva-ot-prirody.html ]Популярные фото приколы [/url]
Мамочки, всем привет. Моему ребенку 2 года и 1 мес. подгузники сняли еще полгода назад, на горшок ходит с 1.5 лет приблизительно... Но вопрос вот в чем. Ваши детки до какого возраста могли описаться в штаны и не попроситься или же описаться во время сна в кровать? Ругали и как за это? Что говорили? Вот мой просится, говорит "ка-ка", приносит горшок и пр. писает, на улице терпит, несем все в дом или же кусты. По-большому буквально каждый день просится, но бывает, что может описаться в штаны. Вот стоит, играет, посмотрю, полилось! И не попросился. Я его отругаю спокойно так, укажу на горшок, но отчего так? Или говорит "ка-ка" а сам в этот момент писает, еле успеваем добежать! Сам штаны не снимает, а пытается письку достать из трусов и стоя писать, но не выходит незамедлительно и мочит штаники. Как его обучить снимать штаники? Я ему рассказываю, но он все точно еще не снимает сам, стягивает, но редко. И может сидеть в кроватке, ко сну готовится и втихаря написать( Потом спим мы ночью в подгузнике в случае в случае если в собственной й кровати и утром подгузник абсолютный! А когда ездили на отдых, то в машине и в отеле он вообще никогда не надевал подгуз, мы их не брали и он ночью не писал! Только утром в 6 и потом еще раза 2 в 7 и в 8! Но он спал с нами в отеле, и я ощущала, как он просыпается! Как у вас

Anonymous said...

[url=http://www.pi7.ru/zdorove/2022-obedennyy-pereryv-luchshe-potratit-na-zanyatiya-lyubovyu.html ]Девушки на пляже ( [/url]
А вы как думаете? Согласны ли вы, что негатив, испытываемый нами, вреден для начала нам самим?