Monday, April 18, 2005

A Very Brief Conversation with Charlie (age 4)

ME: Hey it's lunchtime. What do you want for lunch? Sandwich?
HIM: No! I want extinct cat meat.

Wednesday, April 06, 2005

USS Mariner has some interesting and troubling observations about the Mariner Moose.

Tuesday, April 05, 2005

The Three Stages of Waiting for a Restroom at a Teriyaki Place Near My Work

0-2 minutes - someone is peeing
2-5 minutes - someone is going to the bathroom in another way
5 minutes + - heroin/go elsewhere
Oh it won't help your productivity any...

But it's a lovely way to spend some time as you remember Mitch Hedberg who died on March 30 of heart failure.

Friday, April 01, 2005

A Conversation with Charlie (Age 4) About Theology

(scene: we're at a local bakery looking through a storybook of Jack & The Beanstalk. We get to the part about the guy selling Jack the beans and the guy in the illustration looks like a dwarf. I decide to use it for my ongoing "dwarf awareness campaign".)

ME: You see that man? He's a dwarf.
HIM: He is? A dwarf?
ME: I think he is.
(very long pause)
HIM: I think he's God.

So really, the dwarf appreciation thing is going well but the idea of dwarfs being just like anyone else is not working out so good.