Saturday, July 26, 2008

HEY LOOKY LOOKY

I hosted Weekend America this weekend, America.

I recently found out that since moving to St Paul I've lost a bunch of pounds. Like way more than I had expected to. So that combined with the fact that I'm a big time celebrity means I can offer diet tips.

1. Move to a city that, though you love it and are glad to be there, really can't hold a candle to Seattle in terms of restaurants. Not trying to insult anyone, it's just a fact.
2. Engineer a worldwide energy crisis such that the price of gas soars and it just makes more sense to walk or ride your bike to work and everywhere else.
3. Have the earth maneuver such that summer arrives. Blistering hot, humid Midwest summer. Then sweat like crazy.
4. If possible, have three kids, including a newborn. This will mean less time to cook or even eat and your dinner will often be whatever part of a hot dog gets left behind.

That's it! Book me, Oprah Wimifrey!

_

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

I think this works better for dads than for moms. Generally, the mom still has to drive around in the station wagon, if she wants to get people where they need to be on time. Then if the kids are super-picky, it's that many more hotdog ends (and other things) left behind. It's a problem.

Mr. Smith said...

Man!

I lost 20 pounds after leaving Seattle.

Seriously, those restaurants were awesome.