So obviously this blog is famous the world over for introducing the concept of I'm On To You. All the kids love it, Obama used it to get elected, it explains the Jonas Brothers. But I fear it may be too negative at times. We need positivitiness in America today (foreigners, don't sweat it, stay dour) so we got a new one this time:
I Got No Quarrel With You. For people, things, institutions that have been on the receiving end of backlash or criticism. But for you? They're fine. Come on. They're good. Or at least okay. You don't see the fuss. Why the hate? You got no quarrel.
- I got no quarrel with you, Kevin Costner.
- I got no quarrel with you, Beyonce.
- Pizza Hut? I'm sorry there are haters. But we're straight. No quarrel here.
- Hey Bigfoot documentaries? Look, the science isn't the best but I do not have a problem with you. No quarrel.
- You too, ghost documentaries.
- Aaaaaand you, alien documentaries.
- I got no quarrel with you, more airport food than you would expect.
- Matter of fact, I got no quarrel with you, Esquire magazine that I purchase at airports.
- Oh, and later seasons of The Simpsons? Yeah, we're good. No quarrel. I think you're funny. I know what all those people say about you but I'm not saying those things. No quarrel.
Who/what/huh do YOU not have a quarrel with?
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20 comments:
At least one anonymous bag of hydrated molecules is still grateful for "purely hypothetical 500-foot tall dog". (Me.) This then is a candidate anti-quarrel. If put together in the same bag we would surely not fight, not disputing the need for non-quarrels, and hence prolonging peaceful slothiness. (I hope.)
Split infinitives, and the people who use them, I got no quarrel with. Also, got no quarrel with ending sentences with prepositions.
I've got no quarrel with you, NPR pledge drive.
I've got no quarrel with you, passive agressive PTA mom.
I've got no quarrel with you, Seattle Public Library. Here's my overdue fee.
I've got no quarrel with you, 17-year old daughter...oh wait, yes I do.
I got no quarrel with...
Mariah Carey; I mean, why would I?
Yellow mustard. Everyone loves to turn up their nose, but we're good.
That goes for white bread, too. I'm ok, you're ok.
Rain. I'm good with you, rain.
Lima beans and brussel sprouts. We're more than fine.
Filling out forms. Yeah, we're copacetic, too.
I got no quarrel with you IRS.
Sure I kinda blew you off for a while there.
And yeah you kinda seized me by the throat for a second.
But you were pretty reasonable once we got to know each other again.
And you are the mechanism through which some good things happen.
Quarreling with you is like quarreling with tidal forces anyway.
I've got no quarrel with you, Target, I still have my job.
I've got no quarrel with you, Twin Cities Public Transit.
I've got no quarrel with you, Minnesota Wild, you're still good to me.
Fun! I want to play too!
I've got no quarrel with Life on Mars on ABC, even though it's a remake of the superior British show and it makes no sense.
I've got no quarrel with moon boots that keep my high-arched feet warm and dry in winter.
P.S. I totally agree about the later episodes of the Simpsons.
I got no quarrel with you, reality TV. I don't hang out with your entire posse but we're cool. Count on it.
Musically, I don't have time to tell you who I got no quarrel with. I'm a lover, not a fighter. Cheese is delicious.
John, if you ever need backup with the Pizza Hut haters, I'm ready to roll in with the diplomatic soothery. People, take it easy. It's all good.
(I DO HAVE A QUARREL WITH IT'S ALL GOOD but I gotta take that outside.)
I would just like to note on my way out that I got no quarrel with you, Andie MacDowell.
Also, Ugg boots and Crocs. No quarrel. Carry on.
Oh, also Keifer Sutherland. No gripes from this end. We're cool. And Michael Keaton.
I got no quarrel with you, James Frey. Never let the truth get in the way of a good story. No problems here, brother. Double down on that shit.
I got no quarrel with you, Quantum of Solace. As far as I'm concerned, you were Casino Royale part duex, and there ain't nothing wrong with that. Still better than the last 15 Bond movies put together.
I got no quarrel with you -
- yogurt
- Hillary-ites
- Splenda
- DTV
- fixies
- PBR (or any cheap beer for that matter)
- snow
- overly chatty co-workers
- unrequited romances
That being said:
I am SO on to you -
- turkey "bacon"
- John Boehner
- Satellite Lounge
I got no quarrel with you Timothy Geithner and apparently neither does Congress. The IRS - now, that's a different story.
i got no quarrel with you, snuggie.
Twilight, no quarrel with you.
Harry Potter, for that matter, no bad blood, au contraire. Or any children's books read by adults. Not a problem, for me.
Also, so-called great musicians "selling out" for slick Superbowl ads, I got no quarrel with you. Never liked you all that much anyway, Bob, but no quarrel. Better than that time you showed up at an interview with a giant lightbulb. I might have a quarrel with you for your supposed plagiarism of obscure Japanese novels, but that's really another story, and I'm not willing to do the research required to pick that fight.
So, really, we're good.
wife here...
I've got no quarrel with you Barry Manilow.
I've got no quarrel with you Kettle Chips or Cool Ranch Doritos.
I've got no quarrel with you line at the supermarket.
I've got no quarrel with you Simon from American Idol, and for that matter American Idol.
I've got no quarrel with the guys who pick through my recycling in the middle of the night for my returnable bottles.
I've got no quarrel with girls who think tights are pants... it's not my ass on the line.
I've got no quarrel with the folks at the coffee shop who sometimes open at 7:02, or 7:03... hey man, you've got to get the coffee ready and the music on before I can come in, I get it.
I've got no quarrel with you Iphone... so you don't take video or text pictures like every other modern phone. That's alright, you're getting there. We're cool. No rush. I can't expect everything from one little old beautiful piece of electronics.
I got no quarrel with you, metered lights at the on ramp...it's quality time with my coffee and time to apply some lipstick.
I got no quarrel with you, green can parmesan cheese. I actually like you a little better than the freshly grated stuff.
Also, I got no quarrel with you carbs, gluten, or sugar. I eat you all with abandon and without guilt.
I got no quarrel with you U.S.P.S. You still offer the most valuable services at such reasonable prices...and some way cool stamps now and again. And I bet you postal workers ain't got no quarrel with them fine uniforms, am I right?
I take it back. Twilight - I have words for you. And you need them, because you are possibly the worst book ever to sell umpteen trillion copies ever!! Worst!!!! At least I hope you are. Oh god, what if there was something worse? Love Story? I don't even want to think about it.
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