Jokes Written by Charlie (Age 5) That Indicate Either a Lack of Understanding About What Jokes Are, or an Absolute Mastery of the Medium
Knock knock
Who's there?
Ninja
Ninja who?
Ninja I'm fighting crime I'm gonna fight the computer for lunch
Knock knock
Who's there?
Ninja
Ninja who?
Ninja that sword in the computer is not a sword it's a paintbrush
Knock knock
Who's there?
Pooh
Pooh who?
Knock knock. That was just the last part of the joke.
What do you get when you cross a woolly mammoth with a saber tooth tiger?
Woolly bite.
Knock knock
Who's there?
Ninja
Ninja who?
Ninja I'm in the picture--dah!--I'm gonna fight the crime in the picture
Knock knock
Who's there?
Ninja
Ninja who?
Meow.
What do you get when you cross a woolly mammoth with a sloth and a
saber tooth tiger
Woolly lazy, lazy, lazy woolly bone bites.
Knock knock
Who's there?
Ninja
Ninja who?
Ninja that's a big robot why do I have such a hard shell ow!
Knock knock
Who's there?
Ninja
Ninja who?
Ninja would you like half of my sloth burger?
Knock knock
Who's there?
Ninja
Ninja who?
Ninja would you like half of my ninja burger?
Knock knock
Who's there?
Ninja
Ninja who?
Gotta go, I gotta fight the robot in the crime city.
Where do you get food from the ice age?
In a question store. And that's where you buy questions.
Knock knock
Who's there?
Dinosaur
Dinosaur who?
I'm gonna charge through your door cause I'm a triceratops.
Knock knock
Who's there?
Dinosaur
Dinosaur who?
Chomp
Knock knock
Who's there?
Dinosaur
Dinosaur who?
I'm an ankylosaurus and I'm with a triceratops.
Knock knock
Who's there?
Question.
Question who?
Would you like half of my question burger?
Of Interest
- Conservatize Me, a book I wrote, in hardback
- Conservatize Me, a book I wrote, in paperback
- What Matthew Baldwin, the Defective Yeti proprietor, who made me what I am today, has to say
- Talking Points Memo
- What Jeannie has to say
- What Scott Chicken has to say
- What Tina has to say
- What Dup's Blog has to say
- Deadspin
- Seattlest
Mappy thing!
10 comments:
Knock knock
Who's there?
Dinosaur
Dinosaur who?
Chomp
- This one strikes me as pure comic genius.
- The rest clearly indicate a surreal form of non-sequitorial humor that goes far beyond the stylings of Robert Anton Wilson and Fireside Theatre.
Oh, God in heaven, he's a master. I'm crying.
"I'm an ankylosaurus and I'm with a triceratops." I could barely read it to Dave I was laughing so hard.
"I'm an ankylosaurus and I'm with a triceratops."
Yeah, I'm not done with that yet. Oh, mama. The implied threat of it. It's so hilarious I can't even stand it.
I think I'm most fond of when the ninja needs to cut the joke short to go fight the robot in the crime city. I bet that kind of thing happens all the time in the crime city. I quite like the question burger one as well. Gotta get me one of those.
i'm voting for the mastery one as well. this is funny stuff.
Please tell Charlie he can send half of his sloth burger with you to our next Chicken practice.
And while he's an anklysaurus with a triceratops, my children are both a penguin who can breathe underwater and a dolphin who can breathe underwater...NO DOLPHIN-BACKS!
The kid is clearly a zen master. Those aren't jokes, they're koans.
Ninja burger!
Where do you get food from the ice age?
In a question store. And that's where you buy questions.
I'm crying from laughing so hard. These are hysterical. I had to stop reading and get away from the computer and then come back to finish.
I hope you don't mind, but I linked to Charlie's hilarious jokes in my own blog. This kid is on fire, figuratively speaking I'm sure.
Thanks for refreshing my memory. I'd read them all before and I choked on my laughter back then, too.
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